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Confessions of an Everyday Narcissist: Boundaries Schmoundaries

I had to go to my first group therapy session today. But I didn’t feel like being there so I showed up late. I mean, it’s my right to live my life, isn’t it? So why should I have to be somewhere when I 'd rather to be somewhere else? The courts ordered me into … Continue reading Confessions of an Everyday Narcissist: Boundaries Schmoundaries

Confessions of an Everyday Narcissist: Where Would I Be Without Me?

I wonder who would portray me in the Netflix version of my story. My movie is called Me. Actually, it's the film adaptation of the story of me, based on the novel Me, written by yours truly. Hollywood or Bollywood. Because my qualities go beyond national and cultural boundaries. I can think of a lot … Continue reading Confessions of an Everyday Narcissist: Where Would I Be Without Me?

Confessions of an Everyday Narcissist: Introduction

Welcome back to The Complete Guide to Misery. Each post in this absurd series promotes a different form of human suffering, and encourages readers to adopt self-destructive habits that will bring them mountains of anguish. This silliness is intended to be satire, not self-help. However, if readers’ lives are enriched in some way beyond laughter, … Continue reading Confessions of an Everyday Narcissist: Introduction

Time to Celebrate Rejection

I'm writing to celebrate a rejection. Yes, it's an odd thing to celebrate. I just received the first official rejection letter for my book. For those who don't know, over the past two years I've written a book of psychological satire called "How to Make Yourself Angry in Any Situation." Ran the book through several … Continue reading Time to Celebrate Rejection

Balboa Park in Bloom: December

How would you like to tour one of the most magnificent urban parks in the United States without looking up from your phone? Balboa Park contains thousands of beautiful trees from around the world. Towering giants and quirky flora from Australia, South and Central America, South Africa, India, and China thrive in San Diego’s Mediterranean … Continue reading Balboa Park in Bloom: December

The DoD and Me

I had the honor of playing for the United States’ military and Allied troops in Saudi Arabia and Kuwait after Operation Desert Storm, in July and August, 1991. True story. Spent five weeks stationed in Dhahran, Saudi Arabia and ten days in Doha, Kuwait. I was in college, at Appalachian State University in Boone, North … Continue reading The DoD and Me

Balboa Park in Bloom: November

How would you like to tour one of the most magnificent urban parks in the United States without looking up from your phone? Balboa Park contains thousands of beautiful trees from around the world. Towering giants and quirky flora from Australia, South and Central America, South Africa, India, and China thrive in San Diego’s Mediterranean … Continue reading Balboa Park in Bloom: November

I’ll Give You Something to Wipe

Imagine it’s Friday evening and you’re driving home in your brand new, red Audi after a long week at work. You haven’t slept well because you’ve been stressed about [FILL IN THE BLANK: That project? Your irritable innards? Inflation?]. You’re tired. Irritable. Looking forward to stretching out on the couch and tucking into a bowl … Continue reading I’ll Give You Something to Wipe